You say you want 5Gs? Put more than a couple bucks worth of effort into your tryout, then.

Hopeful #9 - Selin

“I want $5,000,” passionately says Selin when asked why she wanted to do this. Well, at least she’s passionate about something. This is her centrifugal selling point. No, not the opportunity to travel around to various parts of the continent on Midway’s tab. Not the chance to perhaps be immortalized in a bad sports game. Not to be a mascot for a company whose creations you can pretend to respect. Not because you might live out every girl’s fantasy of being ogled by throngs of socially inept weirdoes. And it’s certainly not because she likes do express herself through fascinating dances.

If Selin wanted five grand, she could bag groceries for a year, steal and sell a gold Nintendo World Championships cart, or play $7,000 worth of lottery scratch card games. Let’s leave the Midway cheerleader position to somebody who might appreciate it a little more, somebody who can say/show something more about themselves than they money they desire.

Oh yeah, this is another KISS-FM entry.