Action 52: The Feature

Lemme, get this straight: it's okay if red apples clonk you square on the noggin all day long (and in fact, you're arguably encouraged to do so with the motivation of points), but if a greener one lands in your basket, you throw a hissy fit only the cootiest of old coots can achieve? Sounds like Action 52 logic at work.

Also: why is it that when a green apple thumps a person, a mechanical clanking noise is made; when a gunshot hits a mutant bee in Ooze or a bat is cut in Haunted Hills, a human scream emits? Once again, asking questions dilutes that magical Action 52 aura, so I shant do it!

So it's raining apples in the damn orchard. Oh the productivity of the American farmer - to have so many apples flying around! I'll tell you one thing now: even though this is certainly the only game I've played where this is the centrifugal concept, I can assure you it is not the best I've played.

Basically, apples are falling downward in several angles and speeds. Admittedly, this is particular programming detail probably took like a whole quarter hour to master, the amount of time it takes to make roughly four typical Action 52 titles. The set of pixels you control is to make contact with as many red apples as possible. If a greenish one appears and similarly contacts the said set of pixels, the guy turns to you and gets all cranky as if he just shit himself and is blaming you. What could possibly be so bad about green-colored apples? Aw, hell, just accept it: loose ends and holes are a major aspect of the Action 52 lifestyle.

Also: the music for the even-numbered stages is a fairly interesting story. The composer of the music, also the game's graphical artist, programmer, producer, director and part-time janitor at a big box store (would've been full-time, but his illiteracy, child porn charges and inability to perform most janitorial duties prevent that from happening), tried to copy David Bowie's "Fame" using the sound prowess of the Genesis. He wasn't able to do this, but is still legally able to use the song here because it sounds nothing like the classic rock tune.